Added: Regan Engelhardt - Date: 17.12.2021 22:52 - Views: 23028 - Clicks: 4003
The boldness with which married people cheat in Lagos is so, so appalling. How did the city get here? There was once gist of a cheating pair who died while having car sex in OgbaLagos. This is not to free cheats in other Nigerian towns and cities from blame and scorn, because they are also terrible, but the probability that they are anywhere close to the special specie of cheats in Lagos seems unlikely.
Such is the blatant flouting of marital vows in Lagos that older married men and women unabashedly hit you up, soliciting sex. Some newly-weds do not even wait to leave their wedding venue before planning their next booty call, sometimes with the one of the bridesmaids or even a wedding guest!
The shamelessness just cuts through age boundaries, to be sincere. Their modus operandi sometimes include offering money to smoothen the process, especially by the older ones. Some, mostly the younger ones don't offer money. They actually suck up to unsuspecting victims, and charm them into relationships. Like, they get into a whole boyfriend and girlfriend relationship with another woman, as if they do not have a wife and a couple of kids at home.
That's exactly what happened to Rose 's [not her real name] friend in their final year in University. As Rose narrates to me: "She ran into this guy at a bar where she was attending a friend's birthday and they just hit it off from there. Everything," Rose says, a bitter smile on her face at the recollection of what happened almost four years back.
Eventually, as it often happens, the truth came out and the fake relationship had to end. But in typical fashion, "he was actually flippant about it when my friend found his wedding ring, neatly wrapped in tissue paper and concealed in the glove compartment of his car. Paul is a bachelor in Lagos who works hard and hardly stays at home except on weekends. That does not stop his something-year-old married neighbour from making moves on him. I always politely rejected her advances. Toluwani is in her 20s and has been in Lagos all her life.
To underscore her point, she shows me messages on her Instagram, where a family man who looks to be in his late 30's is still pestering her with romantic advances. That man actually has a pretty wife and three kids, pictures of whom are littered all over his Instagram timeline. Make no mistake about it, cheating and unfaithfulness did not just start now. And this is not just in Lagos alone. The whole of our society - as pious, chaste, prim and proper as we like to tout ourselves as a people - has always thrived on sneaky relationships and covert sexual activities.
People like to talk about the good old days, about a time when society was saner and collectively more well-behaved. But even then, men still had reasons to put Magun on their wives.
Magun is a Yoruba charm that a man secretly puts on his wife on the suspicion that she's being unfaithful. Anyone who sleeps with such woman will die if quick remedy is not found. If there was need for such mortal test of faithfulness, what does it say of the generation which is always held up as the period of sanctity and virtue?
The only difference that exists between then and now, I'll tell you, is just the brazenness with which these married people go about their indiscretions. Back in the day people would normally be scared about the social disparagement and shame that from such behaviour. These days, one hears and sees so many cases of bold cheating in Lasgidi — even among unmarried partners - that it feels as if Lagosians that cheat do not even give a damn whether they get caught or not.
The idea that men are gonna be men and the popular belief among women that every man cheats also helps to sustain this cheating culture. Many women believe that cheating is 'normal' and that a man only owes his wife enough respect to not make her see or know know about his unfaithfulness. Julie [Not real name]a media personnel says; "Many women actually don't care that men have side-chics these days.
They just don't want to see it or know how he goes about it. What we have as a result of this mindset is not just a free pass for men to cheat but as time has shown, a full blown culture of revenge-cheating. Many women feel that their partners are almost certainly cheating, so they're out here getting themselves sugar sonssexual partners and boy toys. This is why wanton decadence among married men and women in Lagos now appears evenly split.
The two lovers mentioned above, who died while having car sex in broad daylight on a Sunday, were afterall both married. In close to thirty years, I have seen, heard and read so many occurrences about married people in this city that it's going to take a lot to convince me that there are more indecorous married people anywhere in Naija than here.
I really do believe that of all the cheating scum in the country, unfaithful married people in Lagos are the worst of the lot. NB: No real names are used in the whole of this piece as respondents were all promised anonymity. Welcome to the Pulse Community! We will now be sending you a daily newsletter on news, entertainment and more. Also us across all of our other channels - we love to be connected!
Authors: Ayoola Adetayo. August 31, AM. Why married people cheating in Lagos is no longer surprising [Source: Madamenoire] [Source: Madamenoire]. Recommended articles. Your Lagos girlfriend could actually be somebody's wife. That instant connection would power them through eight months of bae-ship. Men, women Married people are just getting it on in Lagos. The married woman was still on his case at the time of writing this piece.
Evenly balanced. That's the nature of cheating among married folks in Nigeria [Credit: Youtube] To ensure that the spark does not die in your sex life, taking turns to initiate is also a very good idea [Credit: Youtube] Pulse Nigeria.
Obviously married men are just as bad as women at this. Married men are masters at being selectively married. Cheating comes from way back. Even from the generation that used to hold up themselves as being better behaved. But how did this city get here?
There can be no sure answers and to be honest. Cheating used to be hush-hush before. Not anymore. Our newsletter gives you access to a curated selection of the most important stories daily. Submit your stories now via social or: : eyewitness pulse. Apple Music celebrates Nigerian Independence Day by releasing lists of the top Nigerian artists and songs. What happens to your body when you stop having sex?
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